7.

I went in for my 7th chemo pretty relaxed knowing I had felt so good after the last two, though very exhausted and tired from the weekend before...

It had been my birthday on the Sunday and as I was feeling amazing I decided to invite all my new friends and celebrate.

• So I cleaned the house on Thursday and Friday. 

• I went shopping for the weekend and brunch celebration on Sunday. 

• My mum, brother and nephew arrived late Friday night. 

• My mum and me went to IKEA on Saturday morning exchanging some wrong slats for the bed we finally had bought the week before...and we got some other things as well...as you do at IKEA...

• We went shopping on the way home. 

• After lunch we all went to a swimming competition cheering on Mila. (She got first place in butterfly and 4th place in breast, freestyle and backstroke. So proud!)

• Ones back home we build up what we had bought from IKEA. 

• Just finished, my friend Annika arrived from Hamburg. 

On Sunday:

• We had breakfast all together and cake and presents. It was just lovely!

• Then cleaning up and getting ready for my guests to arrive for the brunch. 

• We had about 20 people coming over and it was great! But sooooo exhausting.

 

• I, as the host, was in a blur as you are when it's your party...greeting everyone, offering drinks and food, cleaning up plates and glasses, getting more food out, doing some dishes, trying to find more vases, and refereeing the kids in between. 

• After everyone had left late afternoon we took the kids to the playground to get some fresh air. 

• and went out for dinner after. 

So no wonder I was tired. I had totally overdone it! 

On Tuesday I had chemo and it took a little longer than usual so I had to go and get Lilla from Kita straight after. Not a minute to recover. 

And Wednesday, Thursday and Friday I crashed on the lounge after the school run in the morning sleeping for 4 hours each day! 

Today is Sunday and I can still feel it in every part of my body...but it's getting better. And I'm sure it was just the exhaustion and fatigue after all the action and excitement. Not side effects from chemo. But will see on Tuesday how I feel after the next one. 

For now I'm just so happy and relieved and thankfull that my awesomely amazing friend Susi is here! Good times ahead I'm sure!

6.

The last chemo was the first at Havelhöhe...and the most amazing thing happened: I had NO side effects! None at all! 

I was waiting for them day after day...not daring to hope they wouldn't come...but they actually didn't! How can that be? They are giving me the same chemo.

But most importantly, they are giving me lots of complementary therapies as well...

I'm on some homeopathic remedies and I'm on a misteltoe therapy. 

It is an antroposophical therapy which you have to inject yourself 3 times a week in your tummy...and I'm most certain that's the reason I feel so amazing! Apparently about 60% of cancer patients in Germany are on it and it's been used for ages...my grandmother was on it over 30 years ago treating her leukemia.

It's amazing and I can't believe I went from being sick, sore, feverish and not functioning for 10 days, to not feeling anything at all!

I do have to admit though injecting yourself is a huge struggle! 

I tried. And failed. Not just ones! 

It's not the actual injection it's just doing it to yourself is a big hurdle...I can't watch. And you have to watch if you do it yourself...just imagine where it might end up if you don't...eeeek

However, as I just can't manage, I get help doing it...and I haven't missed one yet!

So going into the 6th round was a walk in the park. 

The oncologist was so happy for me she hugged me and cheered. 

I did end up in isolation during chemo though as Mila was diagnosed with scarlet fever that very morning! 

And as we weren't sure if I might have cought it from here, we decided it's better for everyone's sake if I had chemo isolated from the other patients. 

It wasn't the worse trade I have to say. I dint just get a room to myself, I got a comfy bed on top...bliss

Dear friends,

Thank you for being there, for listening and understanding, for saying the right words at the right time, for encouraging me and lifting my spirits, for giving me strength and hope and believe in myself, for making sure that all I see and know is the fact that this is not going to kill me right now and for giving me back the ability to see the good in the world! I love you...

5.

The fifth round was the first round in Havelhöhe...

The two weeks before had been so hard and I had been so emotional and down and loosing the trust in the good outcome of my situation. My thoughts had been all about trying to organise the life of my girls after I would be gone, was writing letters to my kids and lists with important passwords etc for my best friend. 

And even though I still feel like these are things I want to have organised, I'm a different person right now...my fighting spirit is back thanks to my incredibly awesome friends!