Panic attacks all day: shaking....difficulty breathing....cold flushes...shivering...
Uncontrollable crying: tears....scared...disbelieve...
Planing the end: organising support....writing letters to the children, to family, to friends....
And trying to be hopeful but not able to fight the dark cloud surrounding me, getting into every por of me....
So scared of the appointment where my treatment plan will be revealed. Not because I'm scared of the treatment, I'm scared they might tell me they have reconsidered but it's worse than they first expected and there is nothing they can do for me...
So scared...!
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